I chose to stay.
There's a whole lot more to it than it sounds.
Pages and pages of tear streaked battle.
sometime simple gets it across better.
I am here.
Here I will stay.
Wisps of MemoryAs the days go by without word,Wisps of Memory by KittySib
Stubbornly I cling to your existence.
You ARE real.
I choose not to believe otherwise.
Your gentle words and support hoover in my mind.
Terrifyingly close to being lost,
hope uses you as a lure into the light.
I cannot turn away.
I will not banish you from my heart.
I need security in my uncertain world.
I can't walk away.
Maybe I will vanish over and over,
until all memories are lost.
Maybe time will tear us apart-
or the overwhelming physical distance.
Perhaps we will be too different in person,
irreconcilable with our online personas.
Mayhaps our families will not approve our relationship.
There are so many things that can go wrong.
so much could go well.
I just need to keep in contact with you,
keep your memory alive.
No matter how many times I vanish,
you promised to be there.
I hope your words are proven true.
I really dread and half way expect betrayal.
Terrified of being used an
Soul Mate Quest Journal 8th EntryAugust 4Soul Mate Quest Journal 8th Entry by KittySib
I have to escape somehow, return home at once! Being bonded to Owen is driving me mad, turning me into a monster like him. I can't take this much more. I fear I will never see my birthday if this continues...
As I have stopped panicking now, I have decided that what I really need is a Plan. As my time is limited, I must find a way to help or destroy Owen before my time runs out. Owen has been acting very strange since the magic storm. I keep forgetting he's a shape shifter since he's always in his more human form to try and kill me. Today though, he shifted into snow leopard form, climbed the tree I was sleeping in, and attempted to steal my journal. I kinda pushed him out of the tree. He didn't get hurt much. Mostly just his pride. Anyways, he hasn't changed back all day.
The magic storm changed me somehow. I feel this deep burning sensation, as if I had swallowed a star. I think my magic has increased or changed. I'm almost afraid to use it. I am such a coward. I wish Stolen
Soul Mate Quest Journal 19August 20Soul Mate Quest Journal 19 by KittySib
Dearest Cathleen, you have certainly found an interesting soul mate. How he passed through the portal to our world is a mystery. Of course, having the bonded soul mate mark on his hand and the intense magical aura could provide us with the how. The very first thing he did upon arrival was a demand to speak to me. He practically oozed danger. Sister, I do not envy you.
I read your journal from beginning, to the abrupt ending stating your intention to return here without Owen Snow-Clover. I cannot begin to imagine how horrifying and stressful your situation has been. You may have changed appearance, but your heart is still the same- caring to the point of insanity. If I had known why you wanted to go to his world, I would probably have tried to stop you. If I were you, I would have fought back instead of enduring such horrors. You are made of sterner stuff than I gave you credit for.
After talking to Owen and the council, it has been decided that you can never come back.
Blank SlateMemories are such faded empty things.Blank Slate by KittySib
I can't trust them.
Reaching back only a little,
I unearth some bloody nightmare from Before.
I have no memories to learn from.
My entire existence is ethereal and fleeting.
My future-If I have one- is empty.
Everything I've ever held dear,
any ONE I've held dear,
all has faded into wispy shadows.
They most likely are lost forever.
The emptiness of my mind and heart,
the unbearable numbness...
I believe I am broken.
I reach for my heart.
I grab a handful of powdery substance.
Tiny shards draw blood.
I look to my arms,
Scars are everywhere.
Again I reach for my memories.
All I get is a smothering darkness.
Screams well up,
and I hastily pull back.
Darkness clings to me.
Desires brought to attention.
If my heart is powder,
and my memories so terrible...
Why would it matter if I let go?
I feel so empty and unreal-
except when I am repeatedly stabbed with a terrifying sorrow.
Then I feel.
Then I hate.
Gone is the blank slate.
Writing is my passion. I also draw some and crochet. I now have a shop on etsy to sell the blankets I make. |
The shop name is BlanketKitten. Feel free to check it out!
I want to reach out with my writings and inspire others. Even though it is easy to get lost in the darkness, one can almost always find a light-if you look for one. I may be a bit strange and unconventional-I am a Kitty Cat Imperialist. (and yes, I'm serious) Anyways, I like making new friends. I hope you find what you are looking for and have a great day!
All shall be accomplished while serving the Kitties, who rule this world, though it is not widely known.